In anticipation of withdrawal...

Stupid drain is still in.  On top of that, there is major swelling in my left side.  I called the office to ask the nurse if that was normal.  She said "Unfortunately, it is".  It just feels weird.  This is the first day that I had major pain and major discomfort since the surgery.  I mean, there have been bad days, but today was different.  For the first time, I felt like my body was not my own.  On top of that..I am trying to wean myself off of the meds again.  I did some math, and this morning I only had enough pills to get me until Sunday night if I take them the way I have been.  With Christmas Eve/Christmas being Monday and Tuesday, I'm not sure I want to risk not being able to get a refill.  I didn't do this math until after the offices were closed.  I'm going to call tomorrow to see if they are open in the morning, but I am slightly freaking out that I won't be able to get a refill until wednesday.  

I took one pain pill at around 11, and I didn't take anything else until 9:30 this evening, so that was pretty good.   That could be the reason I felt off and hated my body today, but we won't dwell on it.  

Went to target today to finish up some xmas shopping...the "shop with a cop" program was going on while we were there.  It was really neat.  I saw two of my students while there.  They seemed really excited to see me.  It was nice to see them, but it really made me kind of sad that I won't be teaching second semester.  I have some really great students, and I'll miss the opportunity to finish out the year with them.  Yes, there are benefits, and I'm going to be pretty miserable at times, but it really sucks to think that I am not going to be teaching for the remainder of the year.  It just sucks more when I put the kids faces in my head.  Then it's real.  

On a similar note, an amazing friend from work came to drop off some things to me that the staff and students got together for me.  For lack of better things to say, I am speechless.  The staff at my school is amazing, and I appreciate each and every one of you.  Thank you all (if any of you are reading this).  

I stocked up on Thank-you notes today.   :)