For the taxol, I'm supposed to take my roods for 6 doses. They start the night before I have chemo. So, right now, I'm on my 3 day of roids.
I swear...I'll be feeling like this:
Happy, sweet, people want to be around me....and, then, all of a sudden its like, BAM. I go crazy.
Not really crazy, but I do get really irritable, with like really small issues.
Marie: I don't want to wear my socks in bed.
Me: OK! I don't care what you wear to bed.
Troy: Hey, can you turn of the light before coming to bed.
Me: FINE!!! I'll just do EVERYTHING around here.
Dad: I'm at the restaurant waiting for you.
Me: YOU SAID YOU WEREN'T COMING SO WE DECIDED TO GO LATER, HOW DARE YOU COME TO DINNER WITH US.
I may be slightly exaggerating some of these exchanges, but you get the point. I hate it. The roids make me crazy. I feel like I'm going to wake up one morning in the middle of a crime scene and I'm not going to remember it....
Ok, so that is DEFINITELY an exaggeration, but still.
I even asked about it at my chemo appointment the other day. I said, "what exactly to these steroids do for me? I mean, really, what do they do?"
Nice, sweet Jennie says to me, "They pretty much combat all of the bad symptoms that taxol will give you. They prevent swelling, nausea, infection, etc., etc....."
After that, I figured I couldn't ask to not take them anymore.
They make me sweat, they make my face bright red, they make me puff up (literally, and figuratively), and they make me ragey. You wouldn't like me when I'm ragey. I'm no fun when I'm ragey. I don't like being ragey. Now, I have to be ragey 3/7 days per week. Ugh.
I would keep writing, but I think I feel another rage coming on....
More tomorrow, I guess.
Oh boy do I remember what this was like! It's dexamethasone you are on right? That stuff made me not only super rage woman on occasions but also ultra weepy emo girl too. Ugghh it was a nightmare. I feel ya girl!
ReplyDeleteThanks, Ashley! Yes, it is DEFINITELY the dex. I'm up and down all week!
ReplyDeleteMy husband has chemo roid rage and becomes a horrible human being---sorry but that is pretty much it. I know he cannot help it to a point but he has everyone walking on egg shells, our animals in constant terror and everyone near tears constantly. He is mean spirited and nasty even wishing some of us dead. I guess we have to figure out when enough is enough also.
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